Europe, Part Trois

Wednesday,  November 23, 2016

Because I am a genius,  I decided that we MUST start our trip the day before Thanksgiving, on literally the worst travel day of the year.  I was already taking 10 days off of work, but because I am a greedy bitch, I whined until my parents gave in and we left on Wednesday instead of Friday or Saturday so I could have two extra days in Florence.  We left over 4 hours before our flight and got through security in about an hour.  It’s a good thing we got there early, because the line just got longer and longer.  Dad and I breezed through, but mom was pulled aside for a pat down - even after the nekkid scan, because she ended up wearing a tunic that had a TON of metal studs on it (note to self: never wear clothing with metal studs on a flight) and they had to bring a female TSA person over to pat her down because all the studs on her tunic freaked out the machine.  So dad and I grabbed our stuff and just sat there to wait.

Because my parents are gold members in the Star Alliance (it sounds like they’re a part of Star Trek, doesn’t it?) they have lounge access for Star Alliance airlines and can each bring one guest.  I’ve talked a lot of smack about U.S airline lounges because they usually just offer some beverage and some trail mix, but the S.A lounge in LAX’s International terminal is fantastic.  Probably because it’s brand new, but it had a lot of seating and a large variety of tasty food.  I had some kind of New Zealand Cheddar (too pungent for me), and some other kind of English cheese with green specks in it.  And of all the food they had, my dad and I got super excited that they also had our favorite brand of Korean instant noodles.  So yes, while there was plenty of deliciousness available, my dad and I also each inhaled some instant noodles.  That’s how we roll.

I had done a ton of research in the months leading up to the trip and had been relieved to learn that flights to Europe over Thanksgiving weekend tend to be almost empty, and had visions of each of us having our own row dancing in my head.   Yeah…that didn't happen.  The night before our flight we had checked in online and it seemed like the flight was less than half full. So while we wouldn't have our own rows, the plane wasn't packed. We had arranged it where my parents would share a row of 4 and I would sit across the aisle from the probably sharing 3 seats with a stranger.  That's not what happened.  Lufthansa, henceforth known as the airline-that-is-dead-to-me,  ended up on a freaking pilot's strike the day of our trip (technically it started the day before) and because Swiss and the airline-that-is-dead-to-me are both in the Star Alliance,  our flight ended up being crazy full because we took on the passengers from flight evil’s last two missed flights to Europe.  So yes, we fit THREE FLIGHTS FULL OF PEOPLE onto our flight.  We were packed like sardines and in the trendiest tiniest plane seat I've ever had the misfortune to be in.  The seats for Swiss Air’s 777-300ER are crazy narrow, but there also isn't any legroom,  and I'm 5’2”!  The senior citizen assigned to the middle seat next to me was over 6 feet tall and his knees were wedged against the seat back in front of him.  He looked miserable the whole flight.  We were lucky enough to have booked aisle seats for all three of us, but it was still a cramped and miserable experience being squashed there for twelve hours.  I ended up just heading to the back area with the little clearing in front of the bathrooms to stand and stretch because my back was killing me, and I’m not even that old yet!

They served us two bleh meals.  Dinner was either overcooked pasta with a layer of plastic cheese layer over it (my mom got this, made a face and handed it to me.  I took a bite and even I didn’t want to eat it) or mashed potatoes with beef.  It was kind of like pot roast, just...not as good.  Breakfast was a box with bread, cheddar, jams and yogurt.  I couldn’t even get excited about cheese I was so miserable.  Out of the many, many, many flights I’ve taken, that was definitely a low point.  

We ended up in Zurich with 45 minutes to spare after going through immigration entering the EU.  We went to the Swiss Air lounge, but while it also had a fantastic coffee machine and lots of really good food, the seating sucked.  A lot of people were standing around because there was no place to sit and it was small and crowded.  The service was also slow - I snatched a table for 4 (and then some white guy just came and sat with us...okay…) and they never cleaned it off in the half hour we were there.  I had time to stuff 2 cookies in my maw and suck down a quick latte before we had to board our flight.  Because we were taking a dinky regional flight on Helvetica Airlines (never heard of ‘em before), we had to board a shuttle TO THE PLANE and climb up the stairs.  You know, like in movies from the 1950’s.  Even though this was a dinky regional plane, it was still so much better than the crappy Swiss Air flight we just took. SO MUCH BETTER.  There were only two rows of two on each side, but the seats were wider, plusher, and had more leg room.

After a quick 55 minute flight we arrived in Florence’s teeny tiny airport.  It was so teeny tiny that our luggage came out within 3 minutes of us arriving at the baggage claim.  Which was pretty much right by the gate.  I’m always relieved to see my luggage, even though I don’t put anything valuable in there, I take great comfort in having my clean underwear with me.  We got in line for a taxi and were at our apartment in about 30 minutes.

Our landlord Gianni was waiting for us outside the apartment - we got a great deal on it and I loved the location.  It was literally about 2 minutes from the Ponte Vecchio - so heading into the historical center was a matter of steps.  We were just down the street from Pitti Palace, and I was disappointed that I didn’t get to visit the palace and the Boboli Gardens, but we had such a short span of time and we were jet lagged the entire two days we spent there.

Gianni situated us in the apartment - it was small, but immaculately clean with everything you’d need (except for soap and shampoo - but everything else was provided), comfortable beds and nice linens and towels.  The best part?  There was a teeny elevator that actually worked!  And it started from floor 0!!!  So we could shove our suitcases into the elevator instead of dragging them up floors.  Yay!

Gianni spent some time with me going over the city map showing me where the best sights were and his favorite restaurants and gelateria, then he left us to explore on our own.  We settled in and with our umbrellas and coats on, we headed out of explore.   After all, it was only 8 pm at this point, which in Florentine time, is like 5:30 pm in LA.  People weren’t even eating dinner yet!

It wasn’t raining hard, but it was a soft shower.  Weather reports before we left on our trip indicated that we were in for a lot of rain in Italy - but we got lucky, in our first four days, the only time we actually encountered rain was our first night there - and it wasn’t even heavy!

We walked across the Ponte Vecchio and took some photos, and we wandered onto the the square with Palazzo Vecchio and took some photos there.  The restaurants weren’t full, and I don’t know if it’s because it’s not tourist season, or because it was too early, but it was kind of quiet.  The square was well lit and we took lots of photos that actually came out pretty well.

the Ponte Vecchio at night with all its little shops closed

We then wandered the streets some more until we got hungry, and we realized that it was in fact Thursday, and we needed to have our Thanksgiving dinner!  We haven’t missed our family Thanksgiving dinner in years, in fact, we usually host it - so it was weird not being at home cooking all day and smelling like grease.  Instead of being too adventurous, we walked back to our apartment and ate at the restaurant downstairs that Gianni recommended: La Galleria, a family run trattoria that was warm, inviting, and the staff spoke just enough English to get us by.  Because my parents humored me, we ordered the Bistecca Florentine - which is  a gigantor T-bone from local cow.  I’ve been drooling over food porn photos of this since I knew we were returning to Florence.  Because my mom isn’t a big meat eater, we ordered spaghetti with seafood in a tomato sauce, which was really, really tasty.  The steak was so good - it was huge (it’s meant for 2) and even my mom enjoyed it.  The steak only comes rare, but we cut off the edges that were cooked for her, and she also enjoyed their amazing roasted potatoes that came out crispy on the outside but fluffy on the insdie.  This were the best potatoes I’ve ever had.  And this entire meal as about 46 Euros.  Hell, the bistecca for two was only about 30 euros.  What??!!!

do you see how empty the restaurant is?  It's not because they don't do good business - because they do - it's because it's too early for dinner for Europeans.  Groups of people started showing up after we were done eating and were leaving.

this bread was not that delicious...it didn't have any salt 😐  But that's a Florentine thing.

OMG, the freaking BEST steak

We clearly didn't enjoy this.  Clearly.  We licked the plate clean to be polite, because that's how Chinese people roll 😂

Satiated and stuff by delicious food, we headed upstairs to our apartment to shower the trip off of us and go to bed.  Tomorrow, we go exploring!

We're going home! (sob!!)

Monday - May 6th, 2013

Sniff.  Last day (sob!).  I have to admit, as awesome as this vacation has been, I was also looking forward to going home.  I was looking forward to being able to drive to where I want to go (instead of walking until my feet fall off), sleeping in my own bed, having my stuff around me, and not living out of a suitcase anymore.  I also missed my Bento.  I mean, how can you not miss this little face?

no, he doesn't actually wear glasses.  You think I buy Oliver Peoples glasses for my  dog?  Please.  He only gets Target

What was I not looking forwards to?  Going back to work.  (sob!)  Yeah...I didn't build in a buffer day, so our plane was going to land around 9:30 pm and less than 12 hours later I had to be in my office in work clothes (blech) ready to go to court (with a trial set too) while feeling cranky, tired, pissed off, and hungover. Not looking forward to that.  But before that, we have the flight home.

Am I weird that I actually like flying?  Okay, I lied.  I like flying in business class.  I definitely do NOT like flying in economy when you have a screaming kid wiping snot onto your seat while kicking your seat back like it's a soccer ball.  

Anyhoo, we wake up in our big ass room and head down to breakfast.  Our ride to the airport is picking us up in the lobby at 8:30 for our 11 am flight to D.C, so instead of eating breakfast dragging our big ass suitcases with us, we decided to eat early, then grab our suitcases afterwards and check out then.  

Breakfast!

beverage station

hot foods (behind the plant) and cheese plates to the left

It's buffet style - two long rows against each wall with all sorts of food.  I have to admit, the eggs are not so awesome as they're still too runny.  The bread (pastries/tarts/croissants) were pretty good, and they had a coffee machine, which I fully partook of...a few too many times.  I do love my coffee drinks.  There was a large enough assortment of food to please just about anyone, and while not as tasty and a wide variety as the cruise (really, what is?), it was perfectly pleasant and a nice perk to the room.  

It also has to be said that the breakfast room(s) were really pretty.  It was spacious, the furniture, linen and silverware were very nice and there was a courtyard that would be a lovely place to eat when the weather is cooperative.  I don't think I've ever breakfasted at a place with this many chandeliers before.  

what is UP with my hair?  Seriously!  No one told me I looked like a tard until I saw this photo.  Like, days later.  Did I spend all day like this?!

pretty green courtyard - too bad it rained while we were there

Once we finished, we headed back to our rooms to grab our luggage and check it one final time.  

lounge off the lobby.  They serve afternoon tea here, I'm kind of sad we didn't get to do that

Our ride to the airport was actually early - we checked out pretty quickly and were at the airport in a half hour or so.  Once we checked in and went through security, the first thing I wanted to do (other than get my VAT return, which was SOOOO easy if you were getting it refunded on your credit card) was shop since the airports are all VAT free.  So all the retail prices in the airport shops are lower than in the stores since they don't charge a VAT at the duty free shops.  SO MUCH better than the shops we have at home.  I wandered around and the only store that appealed to me was Prada.  I wasn't going to buy another purse since my credit card would explode if I did, but I wanted to buy Raymond a business card holder since he asked for one.  So this is his souvenir from Rome:

Not too shabby, eh?  After I calculated everything, I ended up buying that for about $40 less than I would've paid at home, so I immediately felt the need to reward myself by spending the $40 I saved.  I went into the airport store and bought a lot of random stuff like candy and sauces just 'cause I could.  

Then we went to the lounge because there was no seating by the gate and it was getting kind of rowdy there.

a display of my dad's less than phenomenal picture taking skills

When our flight was about to board, we left the lounge and went to our gate.  Which sucked donkey balls as our flight ended up being delayed for over an hour, but the ground crew there was really bad and never told us.  We just waited and waited, and people started getting upset and impatient.  It wasn't until AFTER 11 (yes, when our flight was scheduled to leave) that they made an announcement that our flight was delayed.  Uh...duh retards.  No crap it was delayed - we're still standing there!  They had no further info they were willing to relay to us, so we couldn't even go back to the lounge as we were afraid they'd start boarding any second and since these were clearly retards working here, no one in the lounge would make any boarding announcements.  There was no place to sit and irate people standing everywhere, so we walked to a corner and just sat on the ground.  It wasn't until it was well after noon that they began boarding.  I understand delays, I really do.  But would it hurt these bastards to let us know what's going on?  Or make an announcement that they had no further info at this time but would keep us updated??  Whatever!  Fortunately, the flight was much better with a much smarter crew than this crew of dumbasses at the gate.  

unhappy passengers.  I was rooting for someone to storm the  ground crew

Once I got onto the plane itself and stowed my stuff away I finally got to sit down and just relax.  My plan was to try to sleep on the first flight and force myself to stay awake through the second flight so when I got home I could sleep through the night.  I did manage to nap for a few hours in the flight to D.C. and struggled to stay awake from D.C to LAX, but dude, all that did was make me feel like a zombie.  Even though I crashed when I got home, my body was still all screwed up from the time difference and I ended up waking up at 2:30 in the morning unable to fall back asleep.  No bueno.

once again, my dad's mad photography skills at work

I know it's such a small thing, but a bowl of mixed nuts makes me so freaking happy

this was the chicken something something dish.  Tasted faintly like Thai because of the coconut in the sauce, but it was pretty good.

the cioppino, which didn't look like any cioppino I've ever had before.  But my mama said it was fine

and duh, of course you need dessert.  I wasn't smart on this flight, I only got chocolate sauce.  On my next flight I smartened up and got caramel AND chocolate

After sleeping for a few hours and reading for the remainder of the flight (and eating like a pig - the theme of the vacation) we arrived in D.C where we went to the lounge again.  Of course, this was after going through immigration and customs and going through security (again) and having to pick up our luggage and then re-check it to L.A.  Blech.  

We had a few hours before our flight to L.A, so we snacked and played on the wifi available in the lounge.  All I remember was that the cappuccino machine was broken and I had to settle for plain old coffee (sob!).  I know, first world problems, such a bitch.  

The flight home was uneventful - our luggage was waiting for us at the carousel when we arrived and our ride home arrived within 10 minutes of our call.  By this point, I was a zombie.  Both my parents slept on the flight from D.C, but I valiantly stayed away, aided by a massive ingestion of caffeine.  I was so tired I was getting dizzy and really, it was for nothing since I ended up with only like, 3 hours of sleep that night anyway.  

Anyhoo, thus ended our big trip abroad.  It ended back at home at around 10:30 pm on a Monday night.  When I was laying in my own bed it blew my mind that less than 20 hours before I had been in Rome and now I was snuggled in with my Bento (who surprisingly, didn't get all emo about being left behind for 2 weeks.  I guess old age is mellowing him out?).  

Our trip lasted 16 days, spanned 4 countries, 2 and a half days spent flying, 7 days aboard a cruise ship, 16 macarons eaten, innumerable croissants savored, and we hit the double digits in gelato this trip.  All of it was tiring, but all of it pure awesomeness.  Unlike last time when I felt like I only got a taste of Italy, I feel like I have a sufficient grasp of Rome now and I'm actually itching to return to France again.  I think I need at least another week in Paris, and if I have time, I want to travel to see the beaches at Normandy to pay my respects.  I also want to see Provence and walk through the lavender fields.  Okay, who am I kidding?  Me?  walk through fields in my flip flops?  Yeah...okay, realistically, it would be me snapping a gazillion photos of the lavender and buying up a couple hundred bars of lavender soap.  And have my photo taken in front of the lavender of course.  I still want to return to Italy, but not Rome any time soon - but there's still Tuscany, which we barely touched on last time - and there's the Amalfi Coast, which you can never be tired of.  I also wouldn't mind going back to Pompeii once more and I haven't even visited Herculaneum yet.    One day I also want to return to Greece and visit Athens, then I want to go to London to see all the stuff that used to be in the Acropolis that the Brits jacked from the Greek and now reside in the British Museum.  And if I do a land/cruise combo vacation again, next time I'd do the cruise first so I can eat like a cow and get all fat and then walk it all off the second week when I literally have to walk everywhere.  

Of course, after the massive quantities of food eaten (only a portion of which was depicted here), if I ever want to wear my clothes again I have to rein this in.  So...excuse me while I go and munch on a carrot stick and sob over the fact that I'm eating not a rabbit, but like a rabbit.