My name is Gladiator (okay, it's not. But that's what Maximus said, and if he was real, he would've been there too)

Friday - April 26, 2013

Today we're going to be chill - we've only got one tour booked and it doesn't even start until 12:30 pm.  Hurrah!  (hurrah?!  Who even says that anymore?)

Since we're no longer in Paris (sob!) with its abundance of boulangeries and patisseries everywhere, we bought a loaf of bread at the grocery store the night before for breakfast purposes.  I admit, I was slightly (okay, I lie - I was really) sad at the thought of no more freshly baked croissants and baguettes for breakfast, but I actually very much enjoyed my Roman toast.  Because it looked like this:

why don't we have bread like this here?

You know the toast you get at Chinese bakeries?  It's denser and spongier and has a much better chew than Wonder Bread?  This is what it's like.  And there's no crust!  Somehow, that excited me beyond reason.  And I'm not even a crust hater - but the fact that there's no crust on the loaf made me very happy.  So while it's not a croissant from Eric Kayser, when this dense chewy bread was slathered with my precious Speculoos and chased down with my Starbucks Via coffee and french vanilla creamer (I was afraid of being without decent coffee - thus I went and bought boxes of Starbucks' instant coffee so I'd always have some on hand, convenient since the ship's coffee was ass), I was quite satisfied.  

Since we had a few hours until we had to leave for our tour, my  mama and I decided to hit up the Carrefour around the corner for some snacks.  Their produce section is kind of weird.  After you pick out what you want, you have to go to this digital scale and weigh it - then you push some buttons and it spits out a bar code for what you owe.  Except the buttons are in Italian and the pictures are completely obscured by dirt and time, so when we were trying to purchase one lone onion, we stood there like dunces until this little Italian woman came over and took pity on us.  We bought some random snacks, and when we saw the fresh pasta they were selling, we got excited and bought some.  Then we remembered we had no sauce, so we scoured the aisles.  I guess they make theirs from scratch (I mean, it's not like Ranch 99 sells beef noodle soup base in jars) because there were barely any sauces to choose from.  When we go to Stater Bros, there's usually an entire aisle full of pasta sauces to choose from with every  brand and every iteration possible.  In Italy, there are like, 5 jars to choose from.  Playing it safe, I did something horrendous - I bought a jar of Arrabbiata sauce from Barilla, which was the only brand I recognized.  Sigh.  I have to confess, I am a pasta sauce snob.  What I mean is I am a SNOB.  If it's not from scratch, the only sauce I purchase at stores is Rao's.  Preggo...no thank you. Ragu...ewww.  Sure, Rao's is $8-$10 a jar, but man, if you're going to eat, you might as well eat well.  In my opinion, the fewer the ingredients, the better the sauce as it's closer to homemade.  Marinara sauce isn't exactly rocket science (my favorite recipe here), and if there's a whole lot of ingredients on the label - it means they're gypping you on the good stuff and putting a bunch of cheap crap into their sauce.  That's why most pasta sauces taste too salty or too sour and it takes too damn long to season it appropriately so it's edible.  Wow - that was a big assed tangent.  Anyhoo - I had to make do with Barilla sauce and I think a small part of my soul died.  We bought some bell peppers, ground beef, garlic and onions to go with our fresh pasta.  By the time we strolled out of the market with my backpack bulging (those cheap European people don't give us shopping bags!) it was about 11 am.  Oy!  That wasn't going to give us enough time to whip up a sauce for lunch since it was going to take us about 20 minutes to walk to the meeting point for our tour of the Colosseum.  On to plan B!

Plan B ended up being buying some pizza from the store next to our apartment.  The nice man who directed us to Maurizio the day before - he even remembered us!  His little pizza shop was the kind we saw all over Rome - small storefront - assorted pizzas displayed in long rectangular shapes.  You just point to what you want and he slices off a portion of it and puts it through one of those rolling toasters - you know, the kind that breakfast buffets have for toast?  Once it ran through so it was the perfect temperature to burn off the roof of your mouth, he boxed it up for us and we literally walked next door and up the stairs.  All told, our lunch cost under 10€ for the 3 of us.  

Margherita, prosciutto, and onion pizzas.  Mmm...

soooo much tastier than Pizza Hut.  Or Costco  Or Papa Johns

We actually budgeted a lot more for meals - but because we were tired so often and didn't feel like going out for a big production (and meals in Europe are a big production - they last for hours), we ended up spending a lot less since we ate simply most of the time.  We just didn't have the energy for anything more.  Maybe one of these days I'll take a trip to Europe just to eat.  Literally, I won't visit museums or go to historic sites - I'll just wake up and figure out what to eat for the day and that can be my plan.  Alas, that was not my plan for this trip.  Anyway, the pizza was tasty.  Not the best I've ever had, but most definitely better than what we typically get at home.  

Once we crammed our faces with pizza, it was time for us to head towards the Colosseum for our tour.  Yay!  Like I mentioned earlier, one of the reasons I wanted to return to Rome was because I wanted to do the hypogeum, which they opened up months before we went the first time.  But because our first visit was so rushed (we had a little under an hour for the Colosseum), there was no way we'd be able to fit it in.  So when we returned this time, the second tour I booked (the first was for the Vatican Scavi) was a tour for the hypogeum.  At the time I booked, there weren't many agencies doing this - the few that were used the Colosseum's own guides, and reviews showed them to be inconsistent and barely able to be heard in a large group.  Through Tripadvisor, I found Walks of Italy and booked their tour for the Colosseum Underground, to include Palatine Hill and the Forum as well.  Instead of using one of the Colosseum's guides, Walks of Italy had permission to use their own guides to accompany us to the arena floor and into the hypogeum,  The price was very reasonable considering it was for 3.5 hours and they were going to take us through Palatine Hill and the Forum, walk us to the floor of the arena, up to the 3rd level, and then underground at the Colosseum.  The price was 222 Euros for the 3 of us, but if you email them and say you found them through Rick Steves' book, they'll email you a code  for 10% off - so we ended up 199.80 (or $272.71) for the tour.  

The weather report actually called for a thunderstorm which seriously freaked me out - so we went out prepared for rain - we all wore hoodies and had our own umbrellas.  Thankfully it never got to that - though it rained on and off during the day, they were light showers, not heavy rain and we were fine.  It didn't even really affect the tour (except for all the umbrellas in our photos).  What was nasty though was that the rain was filthy. I mean - gross and dirty.  Literally.  Our guide Vincenzo said the storm blew in from Africa, that's why there's so much dirt and dust in the raindrops.  I didn't know what he mean then, but after the rain stopped and I looked at the cars, I understood it then.

ewwww.  Seriously, these cars had been clean before the rain

So we set out dressed for rain.  We left with plenty of time so we could look around the sights and take photos.  I hate rushing to a new place particularly when I'm not exactly sure how to get there (Google maps can only take you so far) and essentially pushed my parents out the door.  Along the way, we saw all this stuff:

Piazza Venezia

Palazzo Venezia (with Mussolini's balcony, on which he declared war on France and Britain in 1940)

Trajan's Column with Santa Maria de Loreto in the background

Trajan's Forum

Trajan's Forum (different from the Roman Forum)

the ruins of Basilica of Maxentius and Constantine in the Roman Forum

rainy walk toward the Colosseum

mom and dad hiding under their umbrella 

Dad in front of the "wedding cake" - the Monument to Victor Emmanuel II

We gathered at the metro stop outside the Colosseum and waited for our group to arrive.  Once everyone arrived, we split off into two separate tour groups - the other group toured the Forum first whereas ours went to Palatine Hill.  Then we would swap until it was time for our appointment for the Colosseum floor.  At that time, the other tour guide Max would take over and lead both groups onto the arena floor before we all went down into the hypogeum.  After the hypogeum we would then go up the 3rd level (usually closed) where Vincenzo would take over our tour again before its conclusion.  What I really appreciated about this tour (other than the guides, who were founts of information and spoke excellent English with charming accents.  I swear, every accent other than the Asian accent is awesome.  If you speak with a fobby Asian accent you just sound like a retarded hick) was the use of headsets.  The guides had microphones attached to their jackets or something and we were all given these headsets - a little transmitter thingamajig that we hang around our necks with what looks like a cell headset plugged in.  We could use our own earphones too, but theirs were perfectly comfortable.  As it was wet and crowded, the use of headsets guaranteed that we could always hear our guide's narrative and didn't miss anything even if we were taking photos facing elsewhere.

We stand around at the Colosseum waiting for one last chick in our group who called the office (who then called Vincenzo) screaming that she was on her way and to wait for her.  I think we all wanted to punch her in the face.  I know it's raining.  I know it's a foreign city.  But dude - if the 10 of us could still navigate Rome in the rain and arrive on time, I don't know what this chick's problem was.  She ended up being from Dallas ("I don't root for the Mavericks though y'all, I'm a Rangers girl") and very, very loud.   Anyway, while we were waiting for her slow ass (impatient much?)  I noticed my mama and I were wearing matching shoes that Raymond bought us.  

too bad my dad also doesn't have a pair of purple/lavender/fuscia shoes with ribbons for laces, eh?

While we waited for the late chick, the guide walked us over to the Arch of Constantine and began talking about the history of the Arch, the Colosseum (its real name is Amphitheatrum Flavium), and the Colossus of Nero that used to stand outside the Colosseum.  And it was a colossus, the thing stood at 105 feet in height. After Nero died they stuck a sun-ray crown on it and called it the sun god.  When Rome became Christian after Constantine legalized Christianity the statue was no longer called Sol Invictus.  Instead, they referred to it as the Colossus - literally "that big thing."  And the Colosseum was referred to "that thing next to the big thing."  When the Colossus was destroyed at some point (historians think the sack of Rome) the name stuck and the Amphitheatrum Flavium became the Colosseum.  Anyway, we admired the Arch again.  

dude,  I had some MAD ass hat hair since I had my hoodie on for most of the day with the dirty ass rain

Then we finally got going.  Hurrah!  (once again, why do I keep saying this?)  We walk across the street from the Colosseum and head towards Palatine Hill.  From there we walked into the Roman Forum and walked the same path as so many did thousands of years before.

Circus Agonalis

what it used to look like

Arch of Titus

interior of the Arch, showing Titus pulled by horses with Nike (her head is now gone - but she's the goddess of victory) behind him

Interior of Arch of Titus - because this commemorates his Seige of Jerusalem, the spoils of war in this relief shows Israelite slaves and the golden menorah that had graced the Temple in Jerusalem

Interior view of the Basilica of Maxentius and Constantine

Temple of Romulus - built in the 3rd century and converted to a church in 527 A.D.  Now the Santi Cosma e Damiano

Temple of Antonius and Faustina, converted to the Church of San Lorenzo in Miranda between 7th and 10th century

ruins of the Temple of Castor and Pollux

the original marble/stone flooring.  Except it had been dug up by archaeologists and pieced back together incorrectly.  If they were done correctly, you'd see grooves much like those in Pompeii showing signs of wear from chariots

the remains of the Temple of Julius Caesar.  This portion houses the alter on which he was cremated

remains of the altar on which Julius Caesar was cremated after his asssassination

it's raining!  Literally, whenever it would start raining, all you'd see around you would be a sea of umbrellas.  ( I also have no shame in carrying my backpack in the front like a bjorn, or a kangaroo - a good warning to would be pick pockets that I'm not the bitch to mess with and I will punch them on the throat if they bother trying)

This portion of the tour was about an hour and a half.  At this point, we walked towards the Colosseum and waited for the other group to catch up to us.  

can you see how excited I am?  Really.  I'm dancing on the inside.  Okay, maybe not dancing  but I was excited.  

entry to the arena floor

mom was tired.  When we walked in she walked straight to the side and sat down while everyone else made a beeline  to take photos of the hypogeum.

We spent about 15-20 minutes on the arena floor while the other guide (Max) took over narrating.  He talked a lot, and everything he said was interesting - but honestly, right now I can't remember anything he said other than the fact that the arena floor was made of wood and always covered in sand to absorb the blood.  Because there was a lot of it.  Gross!

Then we made our way down a narrow set of stairs into the hypogeum.  Yes!  This was cool, but  not exactly what I expected.  I thought we'd be able to actually walk through the underground - instead, we were limited to a small portion of it - really, the only part we could walk was the part under the rebuilt arena floor.   Didn't matter though, we saw tracks in the wall made from primitive elevators used to raise and lower people and animals, marks made from pulley systems for trapdoors...dude, we saw a hell of a lot of things.  I just can't remember it all now.  

mad photos skills on display.  But dude, it was dark down there and the lighting sucked donkey balls

yes, I take too many photos of my feet but I got excited because it was pointed out to us that the  exposed brick portions are the original floor and the cement paved over is to protect it, but they left some portions uncovered so we could see what it looked like.

After we spent about 20 minutes in the hypogeum listening to Max's narration we trooped back up the stairs and headed for the 3rd level of the Colosseum.  

we took these exciting steps up

my  magnificent photography skills being displayed

another spectacular display of my  mad photography skills - after going up the previous flight of stairs, we had to go through a small tunnel and go up a few more steps

view from the 3rd level.  we are high!  (literally, not like, on the ganja or anything)

look how tiny everyone is!

my mama was tired, so she went and sat on like, thousand year old bricks

obligatory self-portrait of the day (arena floor)

obligatory self-portrait from the 2nd level

Once we returned to the 2nd level, we returned our headsets and walked off while all the other nosy people peppered him with questions.  He was nice about it and stood there for awhile and answered while the three of us walked around the perimeter before my dad wanted to go home.

So we trudged the 20 minutes back to our flat, and my dad was tired - we actually had to find a place to sit down for awhile to rest our feet.  In fact, we ended up sitting on some random marble slabs by Trajan's Forum facing the wedding cake.  Then we continued our walk back.  Then I decided I wanted some gelato, so we stopped off at the little gelato shop a few doors down from our place.  It was at the intersection of Via Del Gesu and Via Del Pie De Marmo.  It was a cute little sweet shop with good gelato as well as pastries - but they didn't take our 100 bill.  WTH?  Who doesn't want big ass money?  Italians apparently, since they prefer small notes.  I went and raided my dad's pocket and found a 50 Euro note - my mama talked the woman (who apparently is very reluctant to make money) into taking the 50 note and I got coffee and pistachio gelato.  The pistachio was good, but the coffee was a little too hardcore - but you can tell they used good ingredients because the flavors were strong.  It just tasted of strong espresso (wasn't sweet enough for me) when I have a preference for super sweet coffee drinks with a lot of cream (think frappuccinos and macchiatos).  

We crashed for awhile on the couch when we got back to our apartment.  I sat on my ass on the couch and surfed the net on my tablet, then tried to organize all the photos we took (a futile effort!) while my mama cooked.  The Arrabbiata sauce actually turned out really well with some tweaking by my mom - though how can anything with lots of peppers, onions and garlic (and meat, delicious delicious meat) not be tasty?  Once we consumed our weight in carbs (really, how are they not all 300 pounds here?) we sat and couldn't move  since we were basically slugs at this point.  My mama was really tired and decided to go to bed since the next day was also going to be long.  My dad and I decided to go for a walk once we could move off the couch and went exploring.  We found the Pantheon again (which come on, wasn't hard since it was mere minutes away) and then found Piazza Navona, which I had wanted to see.  Since it was only an after dinner stroll, I didn't bring my camera, so my photos turned out dark and fuzzy because I took them all with my phone.  Oh well.

Piazza Navona at dusk

Fontana de Quattro Fiumi (Fountain of the Four Rivers)  designed in 1651 by Bernini for Pope Innocent  X

river god Ganges

probably the most awkward of our self-portraits.  Hey, you can't expect too much from  my little phone!

Fontana del Moro

After taking our (very bad) photos, we walked around the Piazza, which was built on the site of Circus Agonalis, an old stadium, parts (the arcades) of which can still be seen.  After we strolled around, we decided to head back since we had an appointment for the Vatican Necropolis at 9:15 am and we wanted to head out early (by we I mean me).  

So we headed back (getting a little lost until we started following signs for Pantheon) and called it a night  before our next big day,